Think of all of the successful people that you know — especially the ones that are most prevalent in the media. Close your eyes and really picture them.
Think about people like Oprah, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, or Beyoncé. Not ONE of them appear as if they have a timid bone in their bodies.
Did you ever notice that?
Those who are at the top of their game seem to have all of the confidence in the world. They look as if they're so self-assured and have the utmost belief in themselves.
Believe it or not, the confidence that they exude is important for their positioning in the marketplace. It makes a difference in a myriad of situations. If you look back — that job interview where you landed the job effortlessly, the first date that went amazingly well, that speech you KNOW landed because you were wearing that “power suit”– when you “knocked it out of the park,” you were confident and very sure of yourself.
That's not an accident. When you feel cool and in control, others can sense that. They trust you. You give off an energy of “I got this!”
You can't fake real confidence, so taking the time to develop it in ways that matter can be the key to helping you get seen as an authority in your industry. How do you develop it? Our behavior — the things we constantly do — tend to shape our thinking, so it's imperative to start maintaining “confident habits.”
Here are three (3) quick tips that can help you not only appear more confident, but embrace actually becoming confident so you can attract your ideal clients.
1. Consider your body language and the message it gives.
Your body speaks even when your mouth isn't moving. The way you hold your head, whether or not you cross your arms, your sitting and standing posture — it all tells a story, especially when you're trying to convey a message to someone. And no matter what main message you want to convey, the person you're speaking to will always pick up on the underlying message — that something is “off” — when your body language gives off certain signals to them.
If you want to appear more confident in your body language, try correcting your posture. Stand straight up with your head held high. This will almost instantly lift your mood when you look in the mirror and when you're speaking with someone. (Think about that episode of Grey's Anatomy where they talk about standing in “hero's pose” right before surgery to feel more confident). And when you walk tall this way, you can inspire confidence in others who are watching, too.
Also “open up” your body — meaning, don't cross your arms or stand/sit in a defensive position when speaking with someone, especially a prospective client. You want to give an energy of trustworthiness and friendliness. You want them to not only feel like you “know your stuff”, but you also want them to know they can be at ease while working with you. How many times have you opted to not work with someone because they didn't make you feel too comfortable?
2. Slow down when speaking to your audience.
When you're nervous, there's an extra rush of adrenaline which tends to make everything “go fast” for no good reason. Your movements seem to be uncoordinated. You seem tongue-tied and anxious trying to get your words out. It almost appears as if you're flubbering through with no clue what you're talking about. This is NOT the look we're going for.
If your desire is to give an air of confidence and trust, be intentional about slowing down. Be deliberate about your words and movements. Make sure to take breaths where necessary. Even put a few planned pauses in there for emphasis or to get your audience to think while speaking. If you're giving a speech, it can also be helpful to practice speaking in the mirror as well as on camera. This way you can critique yourself, picking up on your own body language and other cues that may show up. If you're getting ready to speak one-on-one with a potential client, it could be helpful to role play with a friend or family member, or even one of your business besties in your accountability group.
The more you practice speaking — in any capacity — the better at it you'll become, and the more comfortable you'll feel. That comfort you feel will definitely come across as confidence.
3. Spend time investing your self-development — i.e. learning the necessary skills you need to succeed personally and professionally.
If you're still with the whole “fake it til you make it” thing, you're likely in a class by yourself. It just doesn't work, and others can clearly see right through it. And with your potential clients becoming more discerning, educated buyers who are hip to certain aspects of the industry (coaching, consulting, professional services, etc.) these days, you can't “pull one over on them” — nor do you want to!
At the end of the day, you don't want to look like you don't know what you're doing. You want to show how capable you are in your field of expertise and in running a business. And when you actually feel like you know what you're doing, you feel good doing it. That positive energy transfers as well! So take the time to get to learn the things you need to take in concerning becoming a better marketer, sharpening your speaking skills, learning good copywriting skills, and so forth. It all helps when getting your message out to your ideal clients effectively.
Ultimately, your positioning in the marketplace is partly determined by how you're perceived and partly by how you put yourself out there with your messaging, your social media presence, your website, the way you talk about your offers, and so on. You can have a hand in the way you're perceived by making sure your body language isn't off-putting, taking your time when speaking, and by actually knowing your sh*t. Make the time to practice habits that reinforce your self-confidence daily. It's like a muscle that you build, and will only keep getting stronger.
There's no need to stay stuck in not knowing what to do. If you need help in putting together a plan for your business or to strengthen your skills to be able to market yourself to your ideal clients, join us every Thursday in January 2024 for a special Clarity & Growth LiveStream Series. Get all the details here and register today.
